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I'm about to provide you the biggest colon clean of your life, because yesterday's short article by Ms. Banal to be a bunch of SHIT. Ass sex rules because destruction, degradation, and also pain room FUN. I'm walking to shot to expound on that very straightforward and true explain in the comes paragraphs, yet if there's one thing you take away from this words that need to be it. If I've done my job, by the moment you acquire to the finish of this article you'll be fingering your very own butthole and scheming on means to gain it filled v something fun.
THINKING through YOUR ANUSObviously anal sex is the not correct idea. That's why the rules. Because that girls, anal sex simply inherently means "no." That's favor the an initial life lesson we've ever before learned: "My asshole excretes things, I'm not supposed to placed things in it." good girl. Component of the thrill, though, is disobeying your basic physiology. Butt sex is funny for the same reason it's funny to piss turn off a teacher or take it a piss ~ above a cop car, or burn down a church—except, gain this, the only authority the you're rebelling against is yourself. That's part next-level shit. It's favor condensing 6 months the "getting in touch through your true feelings" BS therapy into 20 minutes. And, unequal burning down a church, you obtain to keep your job and be a totally functioning adult in culture afterward.
YOU need to WANT ITIt can't just be a fun tiny experiment you execute to spice up her relationship. I mean, ns guess that's fine, but that's when you're walking to it is in distracted by thoughts like, Oh, this feeling kinda unpleasant, or, Wow, i hope i don't gain a UTI. That's not really gaining into the heart of anal. The desire has to come native a deep have to feel degraded, and this is other that must be expressed/initiated with body language, NOT with diplomatic compromise, like, "OK, honey, you get to carry out that to me as long as friend promise you'll concerned my cousin's wedding." (Ew, space there human being who negotiate with sex like that?) ns think over there is a time and a place for anal, and also you will know precisely when that time comes—he'll tell you. (Just kidding.) (Not really.)
ANAL FISSURES construct CHARACTERYes, I've bled from mine anus for weeks in ~ a time (not constantly, that would certainly be insane) and let me tell girlfriend something: ns wouldn't trade it because that the world. In fact, I'm persuaded experiencing one anal fissure may bring you closer to understanding the world, since guess what? Life is around dealing with things you would rather not deal with, choose blood coming out of her asshole. You go with days of no wanting come eat since of no wanting to shit because of no wanting to reopen the scar organization that has actually hopefully been developing on your butthole, however eventually the fissure does walk away and also you'll either be a) wanting come go v it all over again, or b) taking precautions for following time.
ROBAXINI occurred upon the wonder of muscle relaxers by accident. Someday a young effortlessly slid his cock up my butt and I was like, "What, I assumed this was claimed to hurt?" and also then ns walked around after that without a treatment in the world, thinking that i just had an unusually loosened sphincter. It take it me a while come realize that the fluidity that the totality transaction might be attributed to the reality that I had been swallowing muscle relaxers daily (never mental why). Anal lube is bullshit. Through Robaxin, you can put p's in your b every day—there friend go, Robaxin executives, I just came up with your advertising slogan for you. You're welcome. Who's in Kara's asshole now?
YOU SHIT CUMHow is this nothing other than hilarious? for a millisecond the feels empowering to it is in expelling baby-creation liquid from her female body, and then you remember the it's coming the end of a tunnel for shit. The image is so bizarre and also backwards, that it's favor a university art job on recontextualization. Or feminist literature. "POOPING SEMEN: in ~ the Dawn the Matriarchy."
WILLFUL DEGRADATIONNo, ns wasn't molested together a child. No, my father didn't win me or abandon me. Why is it so unfathomable to think that girls actually prefer to gain fucked? We're built for it. We're developed to take it dicks. That's what we do. It doesn't make me worse or powerless, it provides me happy. Before I realized the I choose to it is in treated like shit, ns was having boring, terrible, P-in-the-V kind sex. That starts through chivalry and also ends one forced, weak orgasm later. It doesn't have to be that way!
YOU'LL it is in FINEThe worst point that can happen is a perforated anus. Pfft! as with vagina sex, that takes some acquiring used to and also it's awkward at first.
Mary Ann, girl, you space cubic squared.
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